Yadayadayadayada

To those who didn't believe how hard I'm trying.


My sent items.



And my inbox.





So far:

RP and NP has already rejected my appeals.

RP talking about there's no available spaces for IT which I first appealed for, then stating another excuse that there's no appeal exercies for my intake after I sent another appeal for the other courses.

And this came from NP:

We have given careful consideration to your appeal. However we regret that we are unable to offer you a place in the Polytechnic. Due to an overwhelming number of applications received, competition is very stiff for a limited number of places. All vacancies in the courses for this year's intake have already been filled.

You may wish to pursue the Higher NITEC programmes at ITE, following which you can use your ITE results to apply to the Polytechnic. Higher NITEC holders with GPA of at least 3.5 may either be considered for direct entry to the second year of the appropriate full-time courses or granted module exemptions for certain three-year diploma courses.

Higher Nitec, yeah right, I wonder after I graduated I can go for diploma straight. Remember I still have NS to avoid against.


For TP and NYP.

TP yet to reply me with the outcome of my appeal, they mentioned the reply will be latest by mid-april.
Who are they trying to kid?
It could be part of their more-evil-than-darth-sidious-plan to tell me they have no spaces for me by replying in mid-April, where most of the seats were already taken up by others.

But I shall have faith,
I sent them another reply that should I not get the course I appealed for,
I threw in the other courses that I have interests in.

And I told them I wanted an ASAP reply.

NYP or more popularly known as The Tammy School.
Still have not reply my email.
Damn.


The worse comes to worst.
That's the position SP took me in.

At first I was under the thought that SP only accepts written letters to appeal for my intake.
So with Fareha's great help, we wrote in a letter appealing for a course in SP.
Information Technology.

It takes them a week to reply to that letter,
Stating that my aggregate doesn't meet the cut-off points requirements of the course.

The big question is,
"Since when did NITEC have cut-off points?"

We only had GPA,
To those with GPA 3.5 and above, they can get into any poly taking any courses related to their NITEC course.

And here's SP giving me excuses.

So I sent in another letter as a reply to the appeal.
Stating that I wish to appeal for the other courses instead of IT since I have interests in them.

It has been almost two weeks,
Yet they still has not given me a reply.

Then I found out that I can also appeal by going there in person or emailing them.

I emailed them regarding the result I have not been getting.

Not just one time.

But three times under different categories.

I might also consider going there personally and appeal.


Fucking polytechnics.
You don't just ignore someone who's the best in class trying to take a place in your school, you hear me?
I don't want to brag but I'm severely under stress right now.

How the heck did my class mates who scored lower than me were accepted to polytechnics while I don't?

How the fucking heck that I knew someone with a gpa of 2.1 schooling in Republic Polytechnic,
But that same school didn't accept someone who's of a gpa 3.8?

I don't mind going to Non-SP poly, as long it's a poly.
I don't care about transportation anymore.
I don't care about how many peeps I know of in that school.

I just care for my studies.
I wanted to be the best.
I wanted to shine.
I wanted to have a great job one day.

So as to repay my family for all the sacrifices they made for me.

Ever since Kindergarten.

Don't worry though, Fafa.
I won't be the next Mas Selamat and starts planning to bomb SP for rejecting me.


If it fails, it's either MDIS or Higher-Nitec then,
Lan

Sucks sucks sucks sucks

While everyone else stressed on their studies,
While everyone else can't wait to get to their school holidays,
While everyone else can't wait to fucking graduate.

Here I am stressed up with the lack of opportunity to study.
So bloody stressed up that till now, no poly has accepted me.

Bloody RP rejected me.
And the other polys still keeping me waiting.

I hate to whine,
Especially here where 94.384% is all crap.

But let's face it people.

Imagine coping up with your life and do good in your studies.
Get good grades.

And it end up, all for nothing.
When all your friends get into their respective schools.

And you lay here rotting and stressed.

This sucks man.
So terribly.

My bursary I took out on monday.

400 bucks.

Today it only reads 150 bucks.

And then there's my insomnia problem.

And fuck,
That infamous PCB problem.

Today.
March 27 2008.

Marks the day of PCB judgement day.

I could get fired for too many "cabuts".

Then I will have money problem.

Oh wait.
I too having health problems.

My fever come and goes.
My nose feels like a stucked dam.

Fuck it man.

I overdosed myself with running nose pills already.
I hope to get asleep soon.

But again it could backfire and I can't wake up for work.

Then I'll get fired.

Heck.
I might end up humping my cat out of stress.

And no entry gonna end here without typical Lan crap.

So here you go.

A candid picture of myself taken from Fareha AZWA.





Even my face is fucked up,
Lan

Tale of the Hyena, Meerkat and a Beaver

There was once, a story told about three animals.
One a Hyena, another a Meerkat, and the other, a Beaver.

And there's this magical peanut,
Known to bring warmth, happiness, and comfort to whoever one shares with.
It can not be seen by a naked eye, yet we know it exists.

The Meerkat, like the Hyena, shares similar characteristics yet differs vastly.
They look untrustworthy, and everything they do or speak was taken lightly.
Because no one could ever bear to believe the truth they holds.

Then came the Beaver, who became friends with the two.
So close.
So close that the Meerkat felt it,
Beneath it's fur, beneath it's flesh.
Beneath it's bones.

Lies the magical peanut he once was exiled to hold it.

It then tried to take the magical peanut by it's hands, reaching out to the Beaver.

But the poor Meerkat failed.

There was a rule that no magical peanut can be shared without beliefs in it.
Without trust.
Such as the Meerkat showcased in his untrustworthy soul, judged by the Beaver itself.

Then came the Hyena.
Who observed the situation from far,
And felt there was a need to help his fellow friends.

The Hyena knew that this magical peanut exists in the Meerkat, but it can never be bonded to a Beaver.
Well, at least, without help.

So then, the Hyena took matter in it's own hands.
Hearing the cries from the Beaver.
Hearing the cries from the Meerkat.

Cries that were hidden to each other.
And only the Hyena can help them deafen their cries.

The Hyena stood by as rocks piled up on it.
Stood by as the air pushed it so hard,
So hard it almost breaks down and give up.

The Hyena thought to itself.
In what ways will the magical peanut will be bonded to one another.

It did what it do best.
To use it's untrustworthy character to an advantage.
The Hyena was so good, that promises it holds had leaks everywhere.
Using the leaks to several advantages.

The Hyena took in deadly bites from both the Meerkat and the Beaver.
Bites that poisoned it.
But sacrificing always have it's good.

The Beaver finally came to realise the secrets of the land through the problems the Hyena placed upon it.
The existence of the magical peanut which the Meerkat is dying to share.

Finally, the Beaver believes in it.

The Beaver believes in the warmth, happiness and comfort it holds.

But the most important thing.

The Beaver believed in the Meerkat.

The Hyena, looking at them afar.
Smiled as a warm glow shines on them.
On the Beaver.
On the Meerkat.

The Magical Peanut was finally shared.

Not only does the two feels the warmth, happiness and comfort the Magical Peanut holds.

But the Hyena feels it too.

The Hyena feels the warmth.
Knowing that behind the cruelty it has to face, it was for the good.

The Hyena feels happy.
Because it's friends, behind every barriers of lies, shares the same truth in each other.

The Hyena feels comfortable.
To finally let it's tinkering mind comes to a rest, so as the deafening cries of the two.

Feeling the glow of the Magical Peanut,
The Beaver and the Meerkat stood side by side,
Looking at the Hyena.
Who can only smile at them.

The Hyena turned away then,
It has done what it's to be done.
The glow of the Magical Peanut shines even brighter as the Hyena walked away.

The glow of the Magical Peanut.
Still a mystery to the Hyena.

The Hyena had heard of it.
It helped others discover it.
But to the Hyena,
The Magical Peanut ceased in existence.

"Engulf yourselves in the glow of the Magical Peanut."

The Hyena spoke as it turned to the Beaver and Meerkat.

In which they just smiled, looking at the Hyena.

Before the Hyena turned it's back again and walk away,
It whispered under it's breath.

"..because in it, lies love."

(:

Venti Caramel Machiatto is HUGE and STEAMMMYYYYY

This is a great time to blog.
Oh yes it is.

Nazri is currently sleeping in my room,
Leaving his hp vulnerable.

Too vulnerable.

And now, I shall blog about the contents of his hp.





Ok.
I kid.

Who am I trying to kid?
You know when you read me.

(:


Now, as a start (Yeah right!)
I want to show you people something.

Something you'll get if you lied to someone.
Something you'll experience because of you committing a sin.

Something AWEEESOMEEEEEEE!!!!!





That's what happen if you lie.

Not only does lady luck does not smile on you (Victim is playing cards and cheats by the way)
But birds does the shitting on you.

You're lucky to escape from the bombardment, Naz.
If that bloody bird happened to be a trained marksman, or marksbird if that even exists,
I will be laughing my head off at your head with colgate bird shit dripping off.

Naz got so mad,
So very mad,
That he ran away from home and killed himself.

In my house. :/

Kurt Cobain style.




But with handphone in hand.

Might be recording his last words before he shotgunned himself.

Oh heck.

Anyway I think I have been taking too much shots of my friends sleeping in my house.
Exposing their AHAHAHA faces on the net,

Humiliating them,
Humoring others,
Helping them,
To get more ideas.

Hey that rhymes.

I was too much for them that they,
Decided to take a photo of me sleeping.

And because I support fair play,
Regardless of race, language and religion.

I will now humiliate myself,
By posting it on the net.






God.

That's bloody disgusting.

They should have shoot me when I'm having my wet dreams.
At least I look more sextisfying while I sleep.


Because of this,
I too became angry with them for not getting a good, well-posed shot.

An angry, german, nude, flasher.





ARE YOU AFRAID NOW?!

ARE YOU BLOODY SCARED TO THE BALLS NOW?!

ARE YOU GONNA GO TO YOUR PARENTS BEDROOM AND STARTS SAYING THINGS LIKE..






OH MAMA HELP ME!
A BLOODY NUDE GERMAN IDIOT IS ANGRY AT ME FOR TAKING HIS PICTURE WHILE HE SLEEPS!



Don't be afraid, child.
I'm a very forgiving person.

If I'm a girl and I got raped by skateboarders making noises near Simei's MRT station.
I might just ask them to apologise and walk away.






Lanny says:

Chill mate, look at my eyes and you shall feel my forgiveness.



So yeah enough crap.

My appeal result for SP was rejected.
Stating a stupid excuse of my aggregate doesn't meet the cut-off points for that course, IT.

SINCE WHEN NITEC HAD A BLOODY CUT-OFF POINT!

*Lan appears to be angry again*
*Lan forgives*


Upon receiving that letter,
I send another appeal letter.

Choosing more courses other than IT.
Yes, multiple courses.

I resulted in appealing for NP, NYP.
And another appeal for RP.

All with multiple choices.

I'm that desperate.
So desperate that I have turned to the lightside.

*winks at fafa*

I'm also considering that should I not get into poly,
I might turn to MDIS or Higher Nitec (Direct second year for me)

It's a little funny in a way.
If I went to MDIS,
I've not only caught up with my friends but got forwarded more than them.

If I took Higher Nitec,
I caught up with two of my friends.

But again if I were to take Hi Nitec.

BLOODY NS IS AFTER ME BEFORE I CAN GET TO POLY


I shall learn animal language and order the birds to bombard CMPB building,
Getting the workers there too busy with cleaning up that they can't chase me with NS letters.

Bloody NS.
If only I'm a true German foreigner.


Oh and I bloody got tagged again by MatNur.
Bloody tagging game.
They sucks as much as NS does.

But I support fair play, remember?


"Bloody 8 Bloody Random Things About Bloody Me"


1) I'm too open-minded.
2) That I have almost no secrets to keep with the exception for crushes.
3) Some labeled me as pervert when I dirty talk about sex positions etc. Meow2 Style.
4) BUT I'M STILL A VIRGIN YAY!
5) I'm also too honest.
6) That I'll answer truly if they asked if I love to masturbate.
7) AND THOSE BLOODY FOOLS SAID I'M A PERVERT BECAUSE OF THE OTHER GUYS WON'T ANSWER IT HONESTLY.
8) I can help girls understand more about guys because I'm an open-minded, guy.


I'm really happy for you two,
Lan-who-is-very-high-because-of-caramel-machiatto-venti-ah-haha-hahahaha-hahahahaha

Back

*Currently stressed up*
*Will tell you why later in this post*
*Pulls hair*

Oh the long break from blogging.

I was replying to comments on Friendster which some was left unattended for almost a year.
Out of severe boredom.
When I got struck by,
A reminder.

To blog.


So here I am,
With more pictures,
With more words,

With more typical Lan crap.

I have been rather busy with hang outs, work, and football.
Oh by the way,
Do not refer to it as soccer in my presence.

Bloody americans who replaces it with soccer when it's the only game with 95% foot-play.

Why can't they just take it as rugby,
Or at the very least if they don't like that name,
Call it "Hit and Run"

Then replace the original "Hit and Run" as "Irresponsible accident"

Bloody english dictionary.

And I had this bloody crush on someone.
I don't think this someone knows about it.

But I'll just make it official anyway.
v
v
v
v
v
v
v


^
^
^
^
^

I love him.

I bloody love him.

So bad that I'll lick his balls as he sings to "Under the Gun"

I think I'm the first one to find out that Mr Flowers here also sings about sex stuff.

You see his lyrics goes like;

"She's got her HALOS and wings
HIDDEN under his eyes"

"She's an angel for sure
But that remains to be SEEN"

"Keep him TIED UP to a dream
And ONLY SHE, can SET HIM FREE"

There.


Anyway I wanted to talk about PCB too.
I guess some of you have wondered how we had progressed since my last post about him.

Which is, well, a tribute to him in a song.

You see people.

For the first time ever, he actually praised me.
He bloody praised me.

In front of 5 million people,
Divided by a million,
He said something like.

"This is how I want you all to work, no absents bla bla bla."

It happens when I took my pay,
Which is just about 50 plus dollars.
2 days work.

Lucky me no one actually saw and spoke out something like

"Of course lah no absent, only two days work."

But again,
The PCB's sweet mouth didn't last long.

On Sunday I was invited to play football with friends so I had to come up with
An excuse,
Something I'm always good at,
But something I seldom showcase at,
With the exception of PCB the CB.

"Azlan's here, my friend just passed away and I'm attending his funeral/cremation later. Sorry."

Smsed him, shut off my hp and went to sleep.

I woke up, read his sms, and almost laughed back to my sleep.

It's funny yet scary in a way.

"1 more problem u out."

Just before I play football,
I already felt I'm playing football in some kind of EPL where referees come to you and

"1 more problem u red card."

I don't know why but it somehow made my day.

Funnier than a Mocca ad.



Football later that day was pretty good,
Played badly though.

And a stranger who is a friend of my friend of mine,
Came to play with us.

Spoil my mood.
To the extent I had to request a team change so I can play more passes.

I came to play,
Not to bloody watch a bloody chicken trying to eat a fishball each time he gets that bloody ball.

Even Naz who adores fancy football that involves dribbling was bloody pissed.

Bloody idiot.
Even I as your team mate was so bloody confused when you had to be so bloody stylish when you pass me the bloody ball.

My corn on my toe just made it worse.


corn ² (kôrn) Pronunciation Key
n. A horny thickening of the skin, usually on or near a toe, resulting from pressure or friction. Also called clavus.


Now we're going to the real topic.
But slowly.

So later today,
I'm gonna have a trip to the nearby polyclinic to have that bloody corn sliced off.

I already wasted a good 40 bucks in a private clinic who gave me creams and painkillers that don't work.

I hate doctors sometimes.
I only like it when they put their stethoscopes on my chest.

That cooling sexual sensation.

So umm anyway,
I might too, have a trip to Singapore Polytechnic to get my appeal sorted out.

Now.
This is the real topic.

I'm currently stressed up.
So stressed that I threw luggages in my work place 3x harder.
Hard enough to decapitate the little red riding hood.

I've had my results in my application for poly.

With my Nitec GPA of 3.8.
I was over-confident.

Confident that any course related will take me without fail.

So I bloody took 6 courses in TP to fill all my 6 choices.

TP.
TP for bloody 6 choices.

I made some changes and input two SP but I think I was too late.

So then came the results with a bloody "Unsuccessful" on it.

I couldn't believe my bloody luck.

Friends who scored lower than me already got their courses in their respective polytechnics.

The government has serious issues with Germans don't they.

So I appealed for RP, TP And SP.
Just to play safe.
Just to be confident once again that at least RP, which is said to be the easiest to get in.
The bloody easiest one.

Rejected me.
Bloody rejected poor bloody me.

TP replied only to inform me that it might take until mid-april to email me my result of appealing.
Which is well,
Bloody long.

And SP.
The worst case.
The bloody worst case.

They don't accept appeals via email,
So I had to photocopy my cert, result slip, blablabla and send it via letter-mode.

I included my IC no and everything.

And post it.

Until some people came up to me and told me things like;

"If SP didn't reply in like 4 days, means the letter can't get to them."
"So I get the letter back?"
"Yeah."
"But how, I didn't include MY address in it."

The above conversation was mildly made up,
But the last reply is based on a true story between me and an arabian.

"U suck Lanny. Try to appeal again. This time with your address in it?"


BLOODY LANNY
HOW IN THE NAME OF BLOODY BRANDON FLOWERS
YOU DIDN'T PUT DOWN YOUR BLOODY ADDRESS - From myself to myself (insert "to" address here)

God.

I will call SP tomorrow and ask if they had gotten my appeal letter.
If they didn't, well.
I had to have a go at it again, maybe visit the school itself.

I hope lady luck's with me on this one.

Why SP owns TP

House near train
Straight train to dover
Which straight leads to SP via bridge
Cheaper fare
Especially when I uses adult fare
Bloody adult fare

Why TP owns SP

Smaller,
So I won't get lost easily

Why SP owns TP

Cause I have more reasons in choosing SP


Damn it.
I'm so stressed.
So bloody stressed.
That I want to put a random picture of a friend of mine.





There.
That'll do just fine.

I giggled each time I browse my just-got-reformatted-comma-bloody-reformatted-PC pictures folder.
Cause of this bloody picture.



Also,
One of those Reza's kind of pictures he usually takes with others.

I became a victim finally.




Caption: Me and a Bangladeshi worker.



Oh anyway.

Something to cheer me up,
My bursary is ready for collection.

Shopping trip gonna be activated real soon.
Let's hope I can buy happiness along the way.

*Insert smiley face here*


I didn't said a bloody vulgarity in this bloody post eh,
Bloody Lanny

Headache ah

Hello.

I'm having headache.

I want to puke.

Man.
This sucks ass.

Sigh.


Anyway, I've been in a bad shape these past few days.

So bad that I kept making lame jokes and find myself laughing alone afterwards.

Your papa's so cheapskate that he uses gatsby hair-gel as lubricant to masturbate.

AHAHAHAHA.

Yar like that.


And,
Since I had no idea why I decided to post something.

I too had no idea what to post about.

Well.
Chat logs do just fine.

Or so I guess.





I'll update more when I'm feeling better.

Slamat ah braderrrrrr.

Gotta gotta be down, Because I want it all

It's been a long time since my Mom herself handed me homeworks.

And she did just now.

She needs me to print out whatever she gave on a paper,
Which appears to be that food menus thingy you see on stalls.

I done it.

But that's not the reason why I'm posting now.

heh.

So I haven't been sitting still at home pretty often.
And also I slept for 16 hours and woke up at 8pm last night.

Hungry, now, too.

Destiny was so kind, knowing that I've woke up at 8pm.
10 minutes later, Fareha called me up inviting me along to join them.
Going mustafa center,
In the Subaru Impreza.

I had to shower,
That's why I'm late.

I'm that kind who sings in the toilet while watering my body and get hooked up with singing,
Till I sang more than the amount of water dripping off my hair.

Well I bought a perfume there, those cheapy ones.

Oh well wtf.


I guess you all have heard about our new local star?
Mas Selamat?

That man you saw sticking his face up on our walls, lift, and even toilets.
That man whom some said is our very own prison break star?

MS: Mas Selamat/Michael Scofield/Macam Sial

If you haven't heard of him,
Get out of your house where no electricals exists.

So I've heard that the whole Singapore is looking for him,
And I better not see him with a remote in his hand as he runs away from the airport while I'm working.

The situation is so bad that even the foreign gurkas are looking for him.
So bad that even my friends joked about calling the police when they see someone that can't walk properly.

Why is he so hard to find?

Some said he uses black magic to hide him or something.
Or maybe he's just too good at Metal Gear Solid.

Well I don't know, and since one of the important guys said that any possibilities can't be ruled out,
I too would like to give mine.


It could be that he's actually out in the open, but yet hidden.
What I meant by that is he so-called camouflage himself yet walking freely.




[Possible proof that Mas Selamat taking a car ride of his partner wearing camouflage sweater]





[Another proof of the same man, this time on the bike]

A camouflage sweater means that if the police or army were to see him,
He could just run inside the forest and he's gone.
They may use some kind of heat-seeking missile to finally blow him into smithereens.
But what if an apek is shitting somewhere smoking?

Tell you what,
Get predator in to finish the job.
I'll place my bets on him.


For now,
I shall do my part in the hunting of Macam Sial.

Assembling my troops in a food court as I brief them on my strategies.




As part of the briefing, I assign them to their roles for this dangerous yet rewarding mission.

Reza will be leading our frontline assault,
You can see in this picture that he's busy mastering the skills of shooting and such while playing Call of Duty 4.

Hafizah and Fareha, assigned to one of the more important roles of calling the police if they saw Macam Sial,
Had to learn using a handphone.

And Fareez will be in charge of negotiation skills.
His job as conman comes in handy after all.


Apparently about half an hour after we left in search of Macam Sial,
Fareez overworked his brain while reciting his negotiation skills and broke down.
He went running around us and starts masturbating.

After kicking him in the balls and choke slammed him into a rubbish bin with Macam Sial face stuck on it,
I called up Nazri and get him to replace Fareez as continue our search.

After starting out from Pasir Ris, We walked all the way till Jurong
Till one of us mentioned that there's a place worth searching in Bedok.

And so we walked to our first marked place.




Nope, no sight of him.

His short height might leave an impression that he's just a small kid in the playground,
Which no one suspects he's actually a terrorist and not just any kid who's playing catching while looking like a terrorist.

(Hey Police, don't rule out his possibility too.)

And it seems that whoever I gave the role of negotiating,

Coincidentally,
He too breaks down while reciting his negotiating skills.





We searched the playground till night time and never saw him.
All we get is some mid-age adults throwing slippers and shoes at beating up disabled kids,
Thinking they were all Macam Sials as they walked awkwardly.

We didn't saw him at all.

Or maybe.

Just maybe.

He got himself a plastic surgery.

For all I know,
He might already be looking like this.





Don't bomb airport, just bomb PhuaCiBai,
Lan

Return of the ruiner of songs

Guten tag.

So it has been pretty long since I did song-edits and turn them into nothing but rubbish.
Plain rubbish.

But I find it amusing when I turn up the original and sing my version.

You should do that too.

So now without further crap,
But umm there's still crap.

Whatever.


Phuacibai-ted
(Original song, "Complicated" by Bon Jovi)

Take a look around, This is what I see
Is there anybody else feels tired like me
We sweat, They sweat
I sit, I eat
What you get ain't what you see
My pay once again kena LD

[Chorus]
I'm Phuacibai-ted
I get frustrated
Right or wrong, love to say it
Got Phuacibai-ted
Still frustrated
Said right or wrong, I just can't take it
Not alright
Not okay
You always made me sad when I take pay
PhuaPhua, please stop fucking, my pay kept changing

Phuacibai-ted, diao

I'm smart enough to know what he don't know
I'm fool enough to shut when I should show
I work, you burp
I try, you fry
You watch us working Oh-Phuacibai
And then you fault us with plans to LD

[Chorus]


Is there anybody out there
Just like everybody out there
Just want somebody out there kick his peas

[Chorus]


Is there anybody out there
Just like everybody out there
Just want somebody out there kick his peas

[Chorus]


Is there any sabah's people
And those chinese apeks people
Let us drown his body now and be freed

From phuacibai-ted


[End]

P/S: "Right or wrong", PCB favourite phrase.