Truth be untold

With deeper feelings, comes higher expectations,

With higher expectations, we learned pressure,

For I've always believed the priority of relationships is through conversations,

Not just both minds at peace only when we're facing each other

We went on without me ever realising,

We can never handle each other through deep conversations,

The bond, the chemistry, was with us, strengthening,

But I only made it believable to you, in my mind there was oblivion

So I took a week off, away from my graying feelings,

Re-reading our chat logs, re-understanding you, re-gathered myself,

I know I had to take my chances, attacking you where it'll hurt the most,

Manipulating your hostility, your weakness to fight your hatred,

And direct them towards me.

I've been studying you all the way back when we first met,

That is how I learned to decode your lines and impress you time to time,

Then you were disappointed in me because I can no longer do that anymore,

Because I made you believe it.

Your mind always revolves on the most obvious of reasons,

On the outer shell of everything happening around you,

That has always been your weakness,

And I exploited it.

Do you feel that inability to decide on your questions towards me now?

Do you feel your emotions are slowly twirling into a rage?

Do you feel cheated and used?

Or do you feel the need to tell yourself to prove me wrong and deny that these are not what's in your mind?

You know it yourself,

Whatever is going in your mind,

It's not pleasant.

It could either be the truth or another manipulation,

It's up to you to decode them yourself.

This was a heavy but needed sacrifice I had to make,

Since we're going nowhere with our issues in conversations,

An issue that will lead to more issues certainly,

Especially happiness in the future.

Whether we'll be friends or complete strangers,

It depends on how well you can decode my lines now,

I damage your feelings towards me cause I had to,

A little sacrifice for the greater gain.

Your aggressive and independent nature,

Has always been your strengths,

But to fit them into your puzzle,

I was never that missing piece.

My feelings were honest.

But my intentions,

Were manipulations.

Still the truth,

Will always remain untold.

Till the day you'll read into my eyes and find your answers.

Since the balcony to my decision,

I love you,

Lan