Man on the Front

We founded each other at the end of 2007,

At remembrance on how nervous I was approaching the group doing their stuffs.

I was never good at introduction,

Even when an opportunity towards my dreams were right in front of me.

From that series of meetups which I never felt so low,

Criticisms directed towards my vocal range even from myself,

New challenges that I never thought I had to face.

Still it was not the worst of cases,

People were getting kicked out here and there for reasons like "stalling everyone"

While I did agree, I preferred if we could have hold meetings as a group and do it officially.

We finally settled down in late 2008, or early 2009, I couldn't remember.

Ideas by ideas they popped in, everything went by smoothly with that strength in our chemistry.

But when NS starts popping into our lives,

Slowly and surely, everything changes around us.

That was when I mixed with a bunch of people like myself,

Frontmen of their own respective bands,

Sharing experiences, tips, funny stories,

Or just how awesome our bands are.

To the extent they shared me a website,

An eye-opener on what I should have been doing.

This is one of the key points taken from the site itself

"A band is a TEAM who collaborate, learn and work together of which the singer is a part. He or she needs to be able to get on with the other musicians and be prepared to sing material that they may not particlarly enjoy. The type of songs chosen have to be within the singers range and ability."

While I've improved and eventually found my "second" voice,

I hope all these "throwing songs for me to learn" system will stop and actually consider my strength and weaknesses.

Another point to note,

"Usually (but not always!) the lead vocalist is the main focus of the audiences attention. This is due partly to the fact that the front person is interpretating the lyrics which make up the story of the song, partly due to the singers charisma and partly due to the competence of the performer."

Meaning to say, if I had to keep straining my chords for a song,

And ended up doing badly at it,

The shame is not just on me,

But on each and everyone of us as a whole.

There's a reason why I kept fiddling with our songs everytime,

Why I wanted it to sound like that, why I wanted this to stop doing that.

Chasing for limelight might make one feel good, but it reflects badly on everyone.

What I've been doing is trying to balance that chase and make everyone look just as important.

And since I'm listening to the sound as a whole,

You guys need to have faith on me voicing out, changing parts,

Even if you don't particularly enjoy the part you have to play,

Trust me,

It will sound much better towards people listening to it.

Already, two of someone I know voiced out that I don't belong there.

Mainly due to the lack of stage presence,

And lack of understanding.

Having to be the only one who's actually walking around while others "stare" at their respective instruments for the whole song.

It'll look bad on me if I were to wrong people who thinks we're beginners.

Of course I too have to take the blame,

My lack of charisma/confidence whenever I had to address the crowd,

Cowering away from a frontman's job to create and maintain connections with bands, organisers, employers.

But in the end,

WE, have to present ourself as a WE,

Not a him, not a drummer and guitarist and vocalist,

But WE as a whole.

It's time to cater to the crowd,

To know what the people want.

To play songs that people want to hear instead of playing songs we enjoy playing yet its alien towards the crowd.

I was made to post all these due to the fact that I just knew I'm not the only one who felt like giving up,

Because that will lead to the downfall of everyone as a whole.

I am going to effect changes.

I will stop shying away from a frontman's abilities.

I will make us,

A band.

Bear with me,

Lan