Right or Wrong, Love or Hate it.

Much has been happening in the past days.

Too much.

That blogging was deemed impossible.

But since I have time in my hands now,
Hello.

So like I mentioned, pretty much has happened lately.
Sheesha, paint-job, not forgetting all-out hanging out.
Almost everyday without failed.

That Lan who spent his life stuck on his computer seat,
As if doing research for some Human Genome project.

He sure has changed.

Changed so much that cigarettes no longer satisfy him the way it should be.

So for the first time, he went out for sheesha with his ITE mates on graduation.

And it's not enough.
He did it again with another bunch of his friends.

Oh and by the way.
I love blowing out so much smoke,
It makes me feel so European.




They said I look like Chester,
That Linkin Park lead singer,
Each time I put that thing in my mouth.

Maybe I'm just too seasoned with microphones.

And then,
There's our Naz.

Looking like an extinguished Ghost Rider.




I don't find this picture cool.

The smoke is for him to hide his face from the camera.

He sure is smarter than I thought.


Also, the two non-smokers.
But experienced sheesha-ers.

Strange how they got mabuk after some puffs.




Fiza (left): "Aiya aiya, fainting liao, wah cibai someone help me leh."
Wawa: "WOOOO, SHEESHA'S DA SEXXX BABYYYY!"


Oh and by the way,
Did I mentioned we took two sheeshas?

Apple and Strawberry.
I love sucking both.

But I don't swallow.
lol.


Might be cousins




So yeah, another highlight will be that of Naz spark's paint job.
Under my void-deck.

wee.


Reza the Bangla






Frez and Ustazah Wawa who, well, gambles.






God, what happened to my beloved clean void-deck.





All "Nude" Spark




Gamblers and Banglaman





Nippon Advertiser





Frez the next Bangla





GERMANY!





From like 11pm till 7am, my void-deck became their home.
As I ran up and down to get drinks, check my msn, and stuff all night long.

It was a nice experience, at the same time thrilling to,
The chances of a police patrol coming in.

Everyone was tired,
Some even took a short nap in my room upstairs.


Everyone had their share of dreams.

Some dreamt of flying.






And the owner is still so stressed if his pimped bike can attract the girls he wants.






That's about it,
Lanny

I saw my first real crush today.

I'm very happy.

That's about it.


Some people just tried to pretend so hard that they understands you and stuff like that.
Yet they get simple things wrong.

No wait.

It's my fault.
It must be.

I'm stubborn.
I respect my pride.

I shot an innocent bystander.

Wait.

Not innocent.

I don't really know.
She was just in my line of sight when I pulled the trigger.
It was her scream that startled me to shoot.

But everyone stayed innocent.

It's a misunderstanding.
It have to be.

But my pride.
How I broke it down when I apologize.

I knew how everyone will changed their outlook on me when I did it.
But I had to do it.

And it seems like as if I cut the wrong wire of a time bomb.

It explodes back on my face.

Scarring every part of me.

I ruined my dignity.
I ruined my reputation.
I ruined my pride.

All this for another heavy blow.

All this to ruin my emotions.



Don't break me.

I miss my disobedient curly-wurly hair

Hello again.

It has been a long time since I talked about life,
It has been a long time since I hypnotise people to sleep as they read through.

You know what.
Nevermind.

I won't talk about my boring life.

But the highlights.

:p


The most important ones comes first,
You might have guess it.


Hair.


I went for my first haircut in like 6 months.
My mission was clear;
To trim my fringe so I can wink at female.
Cats.

They're tight and furry.
Just the way I love it.

So anyway about hair.

It so happens that the saloon hairstylist recommends stuff to do about my hair.

Layers, trim non-fringes and bla bla.

Being that easy-going customer I am,
I accepted.
Foolishly accepted.

I shall now post a picture of Alan Casablanca for your viewing pleasure.
And umm, apologies for doing disgusting poses.


This is him before that retarded haircut.




All macho-ed up and curls in heavy traffic.
With sound-dampening side-bangs.

Oh and smoking is bad for your health.


All because he took someone's advice,
The minority that dare says my fringe is fucking irritating and it should be burnt.

Meet Alan Casablanca,
The tranvestite.




They said longer hair makes me look girly.

But wtf, I sacrificed my hair just to prove them wrong.
And my fucking fringe now looks like siput tengah baring.

Go figure out what it means.

And this.

This disgusting pic.




P/S: That's the shirt I'm wearing for graduation ceremony later. If you see anyone in that shirt just say hello to him. Or her, whatever you think he looks like.

My back hair...
God...

WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO MY BACK HAIR YOU FUCKING SCISSORS-WIELDER

It looks all so flat now.
And those layers, doesn't go along with my curly fries.

I miss my hair.
Nuff' said.


And I made a pretty interesting discovery.

Wawa and me could be related, by blood.
And Naz hold a bet with me that if we ARE related,
I had to treat him to Madjack and movies.

My grandmother,
Seems to be so similar to her description of her, well, some kind of grandmother.

Her grandmother's husband's 3rd or 4th wife.

I don't know what you call that.
But the name, the appearance description.

And both stayed in Malaysia.

Amusing.
Good friends for years only to know we are related.

Scary.
Because I can't picture myself calling Wawa "Kakak".

Heart-breaking.
To see my money flying towards Naz.

Damn it.
To my haircut.

Well at least I didn't get this.





I can do jambuls now,
Lan

Smells Like Revenge

This entry will be full of pictures.

Of revenge.

And of the truth behind me victimized.


Frez and Wawa earned their one-way ticket here,
Thanks to my dear computer who auto-saved those chat logs.

*hugs computer*


Let's begin then.


So according to my available sources; chat logs,
It turns out that Frez is an accomplice of Wawa

Knowing that she can't take me down herself,
She hired one of the closest to me to do her dirty job.

And boy, it was so beneath suspicion till I saw the chat log for myself.

This.




"Translation

eh frez
yea
what
ah
u go change lan's song titles again ah
haha
who are u to command me
i like direct translation you
eh sad se"

Of course, at first Frez rejected her request.
Since he has been a good friend for years with me.

But Wawa persuaded him with her techno dance on webcam.
Thus, frez had to follow her order to stop his bleeding eyes.


Yes people.
He hacked into my iTunes again.

Motherfucker.





Even Sum 41 was not spared.




And to Wawa,
That is pleasurable.






"Translation

I taste confirm lan blur se
this what
later confirm he don't notice."


Mind you wawa,
You can only punkd me 1 times out of 50 times where the other 49 is me Punkding you.

Since I had shamed myself to prove my innocence.
I will now.

Shame you.

FrezAzwa.


Let's start with Frez.
Since he's her accomplice and a younger 1988.

All my years being friends with him,
Especially taking photos with him inside.

I could never understand one thing.





He always shows his teeth when posing to the camera.

Of course one picture isn't enough to prove my statement.






Maybe his teeth is everyone's main attraction.




*stares at teeth*



*gets hypnotized*



*vision turning blurry white*



*stops looking and smells nescafe*


See.
Frez is one very unique person ever since he's a baby.

So unique that when he came out of the blackhole,
He have little hairs on him..

And.
Smiling with teeth out.

A fucking just-born baby smiling his teeth out.





Alright enough about this Singaporean Gollum creature.

Now for Wawa the Minah Dangdut Techno.

Currently I only have one photo of you in hand.
More will come later.

But I won't be sparing you unless you buy me 3 venti Ice Caramel Machiatto.

Now for the introduction for the other entry.


This is Wawa,
The Cik Pon look-alike that dances to techno with dangdut moves.






Revenge of the Sith,
Alan Skywalker

And I ain't got no scrubs.

I've been struck by the laze virus.

It has affected me so bad that I feel so lazy to blog.

And for the past few days I've been either playing games at home or going out to lepak with organic meatbags.

I shall be very kind enough to let you know without you questioning.

I'm playing KoToR 2.

And I love HK-47.

Completed darkside path, now playing lightside.

I shall give a proper entry.

Maybe tomorrow.


Irritated Declaration: Lack of ideas makes my power heat up to a certain extent,
Nescafe-88

A man of many fears, and more chat logs

I'm afraid of myself for having so many fears.

Afraid that one day these fears will overtake me.

My mind.
My body.

My life.


Maybe one of these days,

I'll be climbing up my staircase coming back from buying cigarettes and starbucks.
One big cockroach starts chasing me from behind.
I'll run up the stairs ignoring that 2nd floor,
Up..

And up..

And away that fuck-I-seriously-hate-to-the-core cockroach pulled it's feelers back to a streamlined shape and starts flying.

Starts flying at the 11th floor.

Attempting to make a nest out of my hair.

Knowing there's no other way,
And knowing there's such a thing called Jedi Arts,
I climbed the pillar attempting to parkour my way back to 2nd floor and into my home.

But.

That fear,
Of heights.

It'll consume me as I look down to small, I mean, tiny children playing badminton,

And slowly my vision escaped me.
Shrouding my mind in darkness,
As I instead of parkouring,
Bungee-jumped without rope to my death.


With my left nipple,
Stabbed with a shuttlecock,
And sharp feathers of bird sliced through my heart.


I could never understand myself,
Why each time I'm on the bike behind my friend,
On the expressway...

I kept thinking about my family.
The need to see them again was so strong that I could see them on the inside of my visor.

My Dad karaoke-ing to P.Ramlee.

My Mom cooking black pepper beef rice while listening to the radio.

And my sister feeding my cat.

Of course,

My cat looking at me with so many kinds of horny looks.


I could never understand why am I so fearful.

From cockroaches that the reason I had a cat was to get me feeling secured.
Because she's one professional pest buster.

From the supernatural that had me looking at the window too many times before sleeping.

From heights till I will kill anyone that brings me up Mountain Everest with the flag we carry.

Too many.
Just too many.

To the extent "Braveheart" was the worst insult to me I ever experienced since 1988.


What the fuck,
That oh-so-manly job of asking girls for their numbers feels more like asking them to dig my grave for me.

Fear.


Fuck.
I lost my internet awhile back.

For I-don't-know what reason.

Nevermind.

Chat logs.

Yay.



So I talked to my so-called clone.
And no, I'm not talking about Lanny the Whatever Buddy.
I just don't feel too straight talking to him on msn.

If you're wondering why,
Go drown yourself in a pool of cockroaches.

*shivers a little*

This "clone" happens to be as fair-skinned as me "I seriously hope not".
Talks whatever I'm thinking and vice-versa.
Loves cats.
Loves molesting cats.
But I still can't get over the fact she don't know what dildo is.

Make her my "Lightside" clone.

We were talking about two photos that have our friend, Fad.
Both photos has either of us standing behind.
And this Fad,
Well,
He's dark.
Not really.

Brownie,
Yeah.

(3:12 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	one got white ass behind fad
(3:12 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	da other oso got white ass behind fad
(3:13 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	why must we whities always behind fad
(3:14 PM) :	ahahahahah
(3:14 PM) :	yeah man
(3:14 PM) :	cuz we whities
(3:14 PM) :	must make ways for some blackies
(3:15 PM) :	so tt their face can be spotted in the picture
(3:15 PM) :	u knw la
(3:15 PM) :	how some backgrounds sometimes can be slightly darker
(3:15 PM) :	ahahahaha

This is not a racist comment.
Take note.
I have friends from every race.
Yes I like comparing my skin to them.
But I'm no racist.

Maybe colorist if that word even exists.

And remember about not knowing shit about dildo?

(3:36 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	eh fafa
(3:36 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	u seriously donno wads dildo?
(3:38 PM) :	dunnoo
(3:38 PM) :	whats tt
(3:38 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	goodness
(3:39 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	im sure feeling guilty shld i tell u wad it is
(3:39 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	*imagines fafa wiv a pervertic smile*
(3:39 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	*feels encouraged*
(3:39 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	ok dildo is a sex toy for girls
(3:39 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	*feels dirty*
(3:40 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	*feels guilty*
(3:40 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	*commits suicide*

Her innocence.
My influence.

Oh I'm a bad boy.


OH AND SHE CALLED ME GERMAN

(4:26 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	u shuddup first bubble lipped arabic goldfish
(4:27 PM) :	wow. okay u german eyes punk head.

Wolfgang Alan White.
Oh how I missed that name.


Enough about this Fafa.

Now let's touch Wawa.

I mean touch on Wawa's.

Oh and btw I just can't help thinking of Papa Jahat when I saw their nicks.

Fafa
Wawa
Papa
Haha


So Ms Wawa told me about this sms she received from Mr Naz.

(2:01 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	he said, can i cum now? sempat tak
(2:01 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	hahhaha i was laughing siak
(2:01 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	AHAHAHA

(2:01 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	u tell him
(2:01 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	ahha
(2:01 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	lets cum together

I can't really help it.

(2:06 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	blg die u want to cum wiv him?
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	ALAN
(2:06 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	tell naz bout ur movies plan
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	STFU
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	i angry
(2:06 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	i cum
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	hahha
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	diam la
(2:06 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	cumming cumming cum cum
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	eh cb
(2:06 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	bole cumiyan
(2:06 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	shudnt tell u this sia
(2:06 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	boleh kangkang nah
(2:07 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	cause u wont kp ur mouth shut

More.

(2:49 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	after i cum out from naz house
(2:49 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	ok i see how first, cause aku nk peg kubur later petang.
(2:49 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	den we cum to u
(2:49 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	u cum to us
(2:49 PM) Nescaf3/Lan }-{:	we cum to town
(2:49 PM) Sheeee-bum!:	dont use the word CUM la cb

I love it when my cat cums to me,
Lan