Tanning = No Way

Greeting to all humans of planet Earth.

I'm sure a whole lot of you had learn about how global warming is growing and how we should answer the call. We must do what we can to put an end to this, to decelerate Global Warming.

Save the world.
Save my skin.

I just had to touch on this.

Ayam said it's like her dream to see me tanned one day.
But to me, it's a nightmare to see my skin darkening each day.

I can take out my left eyeball and exchange it with my right's, turn my whole leg 180 degrees x-axis so I can walk backwards.

But tanning?

No way in hell I'm gonna do that.

But hell's hot and I might auto-tanned in there.
That is why I wanna be good boy and not go to hell.

A good boy.
A good 19-year old boy.
Who is fair-skinned.

Sometimes when I gave a thought about why people go tanning and such.
I could never understand them.

We are the white people, who shines with bright light in this darkening world.
We gives out light to those who are trapped in their darkening lives.

We are made white-asses because of our destiny.
To help people.


Anyway, no offence to people who goes tanning.
Maybe cause you guys too won't understand why I like to be white.

I guess it's because of my nature, loving to be different.
In Singapore, not many Malays are fair-skinned.

That is why I love to be white.
And even whiter if it's possible.

So I can live my life the brightest way possible.

Which is why I tend to admire fair-skinned girls.
They make my life bright.

wtf lol.

So yeah to those other than Ayam, who thinks I should go tanning and turn away from the light.
I will never go tanning.

One of the reasons why I keep running away from NS is because of tanning too.

I've heard and seen people coming out of their camps all dark and not fair-skinned as they used to be, that really freaks me out.

I just hope it won't happen to me.
If it did happen to me, I will break every mirror I see after coming out of NS.


I just love to be fair-skinned, I'm so thankful my mother eat lots bean curd and drink lots of soya bean milk when I'm still chilling around in her stomach.

She said that might be the reason why I'm fair-skinned.

So yeah to all who are pregnant with a child or something, here's my secret recipe.



Getting a fair-skinned baby

Ingredients: Soya bean milk, bean curd.

Directions: Force yourself to eat 10 or more bowls of bean curds a day, and drink 2 bottles of soya bean milk each time you finish your bean curd.

Side-effects: You might experience diarrohea(sp?) sometimes, but do not be afraid. It's perfectly normal.



There you go!


Mr Brightside,
Lan