Interesting Theory

THE PHILOSOPHY OF AMBIGUITY...


1 DON'T SWEAT THE PETTY THINGS AND DON'T PET THE SWEATY THINGS.

2 ONE TEQUILA, TWO TEQUILA, THREE TEQUILA, FLOOR.....

3 ATHEISM IS A NON-PROPHET ORGANIZATION.

4 THE MAIN REASON SANTA IS SO JOLLY IS BECAUSE HE KNOWS WHERE ALL THE BAD GIRLS LIVE!

5 I WENT TO A BOOKSTORE AND ASKED THE SALESWOMAN, "WHERE'S THE SELF-HELP SECTION?" SHE SAID IF SHE TOLD ME, IT WOULD DEFEAT THE PURPOSE.

6 WHAT IF THERE WERE NO HYPOTHETICAL QUESTIONS?

7 IF A DEAF PERSON SWEARS, DOES HIS MOTHER WASH HIS HANDS WITH SOAP?

8 IF SOMEONE WITH MULTIPLE PERSONALITIES THREATENS TO KILL HIMSELF, IS IT CONSIDERED A HOSTAGE SITUATION?

9 IS THERE ANOTHER WORD FOR SYNONYM?

10 WHERE DO FOREST RANGERS GO TO "GET AWAY FROM IT ALL?"

11 WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOU SEE AN ENDANGERED ANIMAL EATING AN ENDANGERED PLANT?

12 WHY DO THEY LOCK GAS STATION BATHROOMS? ARE THEY AFRAID SOMEONE WILL CLEAN THEM?

13 IF A TURTLE DOESN'T HAVE A SHELL, IS HE HOMELESS OR NAKED?

14 IF THE POLICE ARREST A MIME, DO THEY TELL HIM HE HAS THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT?

15 WHY DO THEY PUT BRAILLE ON THE DRIVE-THROUGH BANK MACHINES?

16 WHAT WAS THE BEST THING BEFORE SLICED BREAD?

17 ONE NICE THING ABOUT EGOTISTS: THEY DON'T TALK ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE.

18 DOES THE LITTLE MERMAID WEAR AN ALGE-BRA?

19 HOW IS IT POSSIBLE TO HAVE A CIVIL WAR?

20 IF ONE SYNCHRONIZED SWIMMER DROWNS, DO THE REST DROWN TOO? (ONE CAN ONLY HOPE! FANCY CALLING IT A SPORT!)

21 IF YOU ATE BOTH PASTA AND ANTIPASTO, WOULD YOU STILL BE HUNGRY?

22 IF YOU TRY TO FAIL, AND SUCCEED, WHICH HAVE YOU DONE?

23 WHOSE CRUEL IDEA WAS IT FOR THE WORD "LISP" TO HAVE "S" IN IT?

24 WHY IS IT CALLED TOURIST SEASON IF WE CAN'T SHOOT AT THEM?

25 WHY IS THERE AN EXPIRATION DATE ON SOUR CREAM?

26 IF YOU SPIN AN ORIENTAL MAN IN A CIRCLE THREE TIMES DOES HE BECOME DISORIENTED?

27 CAN AN ATHEIST GET INSURANCE AGAINST ACTS OF GOD?


Sorry if I cracked your brains up, I'm just cruel at times. :)